Wednesday 6 January 2010

Rewarding chavs for not breaking the law

Imagine that kids could be paid money every year, simply by doing what they were supposed to. (Not hard, this has already been suggested with payments to kids for turning up to school).

Now imagine that this was a scheme for kids who ride mopeds. Since we're not Italian, this means (in the majority) - well, people like this.



After all, most decent human beings wait a year until they can afford (and drive) a car.

Now imagine they can also claim cash for taking part in a free karting session.

Now imagine that this scheme is run by The West of England Road Safety Partnership. This means that essentially, fines collected from "safety cameras" are not going on improving pedestrian safety, or covering the £15 "victims levy" they're planning on introducing, but paying for chavs to drink cans of white lightning at bus stops.

Sounds ridiculous, right?

Now stop imagining, and realise that this scheme is fucking for real.

Welcome to keepyourwheels.com.

Do you ride a scooter, moped or motorbike in the West Country? If so, you could bag up to £100 for being one of the best riders!

Sign up and enjoy FREE Go Karting, One to One Training plus lots of cool games & quizzes!


Essentially, a chav can get £100 a year if they:

* complete all 12 keepyourwheels monthly quizzes
* provide proof of insurance, MOT & driving licence
* attend a FREE Go Karting session (quote: "yes, we mean it!")
* attend a FREE One to One training session (quote: "we come to your door!")
* keeping a clean licence for 12 months

If they get three points they lose £20.

OK, it's only £100 which due to the value of our currency is worth fuck-all, but they're still esssentially paying moped-riding chavs (and treating them to Go-Karting) to do what they should do anyway i.e. not get points on their license, pass their CBT, and MOT, tax and insure it.

But can you get £100 a year for insuring, MOTing and taxing your car?

Nope.

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